Q: I’m having such a hard time getting clients and sometimes I can’t get past that I’m probably doing my business all wrong. I wonder if I’m ever going to get anywhere significant with my business. What can I do when I get stuck? charlotte family photographer
A: When we are young we learn stories about ourselves and about what life is supposed to look like, how we are supposed to act, what we are supposed to do. charlotte family photographer
Whether we realize it or not we build a life around those beliefs. Often those beliefs come from generations of believers in your family. Sometimes those beliefs center on what women do and don’t do in your family, what money is for and what it’s not for, how you spend it and how you don’t spend it. charlotte family photographer
Some of these stories serve us and some of them don’t.
No matter what, our subconscious wants to keep us in the stories that we’ve always known. Those stories are safe to belief. Those stories and the ones that keep us where we are.
What being stuck means charlotte family photographer
The most important thing to our subconscious part of our life is that we stay where we are. The subconscious part of us is what controls our body. It’s the part that immediately goes to work the second our body gets a fever and it works tirelessly, pulling out all of the stops, doing whatever it takes to get our body back to zero (or 97.2 degrees). That’s the subconscious’s job. It’s constantly protecting us and keeping us right where we are…in the safety zone.
Except that’s not what we always need. Our subconscious does NOT like change. The thing it loves the most is ABSOLUTELY NO CHANGE. If something changes, it completely FREAKS OUT. And it will do anything it can to get you to stay the way you are. Your subconscious will pull out all of the stops, try everything at it’s disposal, to keep you right where you’re at.
So when you try a new way to parent or a new business practice or meet someone new. Your subconscious at some point will FREAK OUT.
It will pull out the stops trying to keep your from doing the new thing. If it has to resort to calling you names, telling you you’re worthless, that you can’t do this, that you’re not enough and you never will be, that you’re just not cut out for art or numbers or this parenting gig. It’s not because all of that stuff is true, it’s because you are making your subconscious very uncomfortable and so it’s throwing out everything it can to get you to JUST STOP TRYING TO CHANGE!
When we get hurt by something someone has said about us or told us about ourselves, when we don’t live up to the ideal mom person we’ve built up in our head (even though we knew in our heart that that mom is not the best mom for you to be or for your kids to have) when we know that a change has to be made in our business and that where never we try to make changes ourselves and it keeps not working out then the subconscious mind goes on red alert :REVERSE REVERSE!!
Four ways to get past your subconscious trying to stop you:
During this week I’m going to share how these four things will help you breakthrough the stuff you’re believing about yourself and your business. Make sure not to miss this series by getting on my email list.
PS If things like this keep you from doing what you know you’re really supposed to do in this world, sign up for a call with me HERE. I’d love to support you in moving out of stuck-ness and toward more freedom!
Make sure to get your copy of my free e-book. CLICK HERE!
Davina Fear is Business Coach for Creative Women who want to be more fearless in their life and business. She’s also a Familyness Adventurer and Life Story Photographer. Dinner time is one of her favorite times of day as long as she doesn’t have to make dinner by herself.