Better Together Tip #5: Nourish Love

Tip #5.

by mike fear

love and food

Nourishing your relationship is a lot like the kind of food you give your body.

I saw an advertisement yesterday for yet another movie on how all Americans are overweight and how something like 40% of us either have diabetes or will soon be getting it.

helpful info vs noise

The ads have similar messages; added sugar is killing us and we had better wake up soon or this will be the end and on it goes. You’ve heard the studies, you’ve probably watched some of these documentaries that have chilling stats about our state of health here in the USA.

I am sure there is a lot of truth here, but I rarely watch things many of them seem designed to scare or manipulate.

the sentence that got my attention

I did hear something about food a couple of months ago however, that rocked my world: “we are eating more calories than ever today, but are getting less nourishment.” I am not sure why, but this spoke to me at a deep level.

I have been on a roller coaster with my weight for years, but his simple statement was like a huge neon sign that kept flashing:

Nourish Your Body! Nourish Your Body!

It isn’t always easy to do this with crazy busy lifestyles, tons of fast food and processed food available to us, and the flat out convenience of it all. But, as I have thought and worked the last couple of months to nourish my body, I have felt a profound change in my relationship with food, my body and my health in general. (down 20lbs already, yay!)

what I ask myself now about the food I eat

I now ask myself, “Will this food nourish my body?  If the answer is no, I either eat something else, or only have a bite or two, or in some cases, have none at all! It didn’t happen all at once, but with each choice to nourish my body, I have started to feel more self control, to have more energy, to just feel better! It has been wonderful.

how nutrition relates to the way I love Davina

The same principle applies to our married life.  We have more technology today than ever to make our life convenient, more information all around us, more means of communication open to us, but many of us are starving for nourishment.

We work on our computers, sit next to one another on the couch or across that table at dinner, or lie in bed looking at our phones, often absorbed in thoughts, humor, worries or other things that are far away from the one sitting next to us.

We are more connected than ever, but we are starving for deep connections.

what I ask myself when it comes to Davina

I have started to ask myself, will this nourish my relationship with Davina? If the answer is no, I try to make a different choice.

I have spent more time listening, reached out to hold her hand, texted fun and silly things to let her know that she is on my mind. I have tried harder to surrender to conversations when I’d rather be doing something else, to honor her needs and to ask her, how can I help you?

food and love, what they have in common

Like making better food choices, it will take some time to feel the effects of a single act, but I know that each little choice I make to nourish my marriage and as a result, to nourish the one I have chosen to spend my life with, nourishes my spirit as well, and that feels pretty great.

-Mike

If you love this tip, you will want to check out Better Together:

Mike Fear is a the super awesome husband/dad/Hot Guy to  Davina Fear’s Familyness Adventuring. He is her favorite person to have movie quoting marathons with, come home to, and witness his love for others.  he is completely and absolutely the best part of her life.

This is his first blog post at davinafear.com.  And he’s participating in Better Together: A Marriage Adventure?  Are you? Get your seat here!