2nd Day of School.

“Remember, your teacher is like Miss Honey in Matilda.” Charlotte family photographer

I say to Grace on our way into the school. It is a beautiful morning, the clouds are fluffy and blue sky is promising to fight off the dark clouds in the distance. Charlotte family photographer

It’s just me and Grace now because Miriam and Emma jumped out of the van when we went through the drop off circle. They were anxious not to be late on their second day of school. They have always had each other. They have never had to go down the long hallway to their classroom alone. Some years they share the same teacher. The farthest they have ever been from one another is a next door classroom. They can count on seeing a familiar face all day long just yards away, they eat together at lunch, and play together at recess, they have similar friends. They are never alone.

Grace is. And so she has to be more brave. She sees her sisters walking down at the other end of the hall, they are talking and laughing, and about to turn the corner. Grace keeps looking as they just get farther away. They are oblivious to her still standing at the turn to the 2nd grade hallway as they dash to class hoping they will make it before the bell rings.

Grace is still there when the late bell sounds. I am at her side and I know she is thinking of how nice it would be to have a twin sister that she could walk down this long stretch of hallway with and then see here and there all day long.

And in this moment I wish it for her, too. charlotte family photographer

I know she has to be more brave…at least it feels that way. She has to walk her own path down a deserted hallway and into a new experience…and every year it’s hard to see her sisters go their own way after a summer of playing forts, school, and house, crafting, doing sidewalk chalk, going to the park, swimming…always together. Happy memories of her sisters feel like they are walking down the hall away from her. Over the summer the line between their ages blur. They are mostly just friends having fun together. Loving one another’s company. With school back in session comes the reminder that Grace is younger. She is not part of the ‘triplets’. They are twins and she…she is seven.

It’s not something we’ve ever talked about.

The invisible boundaries of our family seem to fall away and become more pronounced when school starts.

It happens for all of us. We all go back to our more specifically assigned places in life. Emmett is in High School, Mike goes back to a more structured work schedule, the girls go to elementary school, and I go back to being home alone with more quiet time to work. My role as stay at home mom and small business owner becomes more clear.

I’m standing next to Grace in the hallway. I smell the newly waxed floor and the brewing coffee. I see teachers talking and students attentive as we walk past newly decorated classrooms. I start walking down the 2nd grade hallway with Gracie’s hand tightly clasped in mine. The school is quiet. We keep walking and I know that around the corner is Gracie’s classroom. I wonder how brave she is going to be.

She looks up at me and wipes tears from her cheek quickly. She puts her hand back in mine. We are getting closer. We hear the teacher say to someone we can’t see, ‘Oh my. Oh goodness. You need a tissue? Oh you do! Your nose is bleeding! Here take this and go to the nurse.” I think that Grace is going to falter. She pauses. Looks in the room. The bleeding nose boy walks out. And with out looking back Grace marches in the room with determination on her face. I know she’s made a B-line for her desk and sat down in her chair as inconspicuously as possible. I want to peek my head in and double check that she is okay.

I decide not to…it’s my turn to be brave. I walk down that long hallway. And I don’t look back. I want to be like Grace and be brave and walk resolutely back to my car. charlotte family photographer

Today I am glad that Mike is not here to ask me if I am okay. Because if he were I’d break into tears and my voice would falter the same as it did yesterday….

I resist the urge to run back to Gracie’s classroom and ask her to come home with me. Instead, I keep walking down the quiet elementary school hallway back to my waiting car…

PS I would love for you to have my e-book. You can get your free copy by CLICKING HERE.